Christ at the Center: Strengthening Marriages through the First Pillar

Marriage, in its truest and holiest form, is not a human invention nor a mere social contract. It is a sacred covenant ordained by the Almighty in the very beginning. Genesis 2:24 (NLT) declares, “This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” This union, this divine mystery, was not meant to be navigated by human strength alone. It was always meant to be guided and sustained by the hand of God.

In today’s world, marriage is often subjected to the pressures of culture, career, convenience, and even compromise. But when we reflect upon the First Pillar—The Importance of God and Keeping Him as Your Focus—we find the foundation upon which every godly marriage must be built. If God is not the cornerstone of a marriage, then the structure, no matter how beautifully adorned, is inherently unstable.

The challenges that married couples face—miscommunication, unmet expectations, financial stress, the distractions of worldly pursuits—are not unfamiliar to God. He designed the covenant, and He sustains it. Therefore, it is only by placing Him at the center that marriages can thrive in both peace and purpose.

As we explore this message, I invite you to look deeply into your own relationships and examine whether the Lord truly stands at the center—or has He been quietly pushed to the side? Let us journey together to rediscover the sacred strength that flows from a marriage rooted in the First Pillar.

Many couples enter into marriage with a strong desire for emotional and physical closeness, and rightly so. These are sacred and beautiful elements of the marital relationship. Yet, far too often, they are pursued while spiritual intimacy is overlooked or even neglected altogether. But herein lies the profound truth: when a couple grows together spiritually, every other area of their relationship is strengthened and sanctified.

The Apostle Paul, in his letter to the Colossians, speaks of setting our sights on the realities of heaven. When both husband and wife turn their eyes toward God, they are no longer journeying separately but are drawn together, step by step, on the same divine path. The more each spouse seeks after Christ, the more their hearts converge in unity, grace, and mutual understanding.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 (NLT) offers this timeless wisdom: “A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.” That third strand—often overlooked—is the very presence of Christ in the center of the marriage. He is the strength that binds, the grace that restores, and the peace that steadies.

Spiritual intimacy takes root when couples:

• Pray together, inviting God into both their joys and struggles.
• Read and reflect upon Scripture together, allowing the Word of God to shape their hearts and decisions.
• Worship together, acknowledging the sovereignty of the One who sustains them.
• Fast and seek guidance together, particularly during times of uncertainty or transition.

In our own marriage, my wife and I have discovered the immeasurable blessing of setting aside time for spiritual discipline. Each morning, we begin our day with a devotional, grounding our hearts and minds in God’s Word before we face the world. Each evening, we return together in prayer, lifting up our burdens, our thanks, and our petitions before the Lord. These moments are not hurried obligations, but sacred appointments—time we gladly and reverently dedicate to our Lord and to one another. In doing so, we not only draw closer to God, but to each other, building a bond that is strengthened daily by grace and truth.

When spiritual intimacy is nurtured, a marriage becomes a testimony to the world: not of perfection, but of perseverance, transformation, and divine partnership.

It is one thing to know that God should be the center of a marriage—it is another to live that truth daily, intentionally, and with unwavering commitment. The First Pillar—The Importance of God and Keeping Him as Your Focus—is not a one-time decision made at the altar; it is a daily, deliberate act of faithfulness, surrender, and obedience.

In our hurried and often chaotic lives, spiritual habits must be cultivated and protected. A Christ-centered marriage doesn’t just happen by accident; it is built over time by two hearts fully submitted to the Lord.

Here are several ways couples can embody the First Pillar each day:

Pray together with purpose. Prayer doesn’t need to be long or poetic; it needs only to be honest and united. Begin the day by inviting God to lead, and end the day by giving thanks and lifting up each other’s burdens.

Read and reflect on Scripture together. Even a short passage read aloud can open the door to rich conversation and shared understanding. The Word of God acts as a lamp to your path—not just individually, but as one flesh.

Attend church and serve together. Worshiping in community reinforces your spiritual foundation and models faithfulness to those around you, especially children and younger couples who look to your example.

Set spiritual goals as a couple. Whether it’s memorizing Scripture, reading through the Bible in a year, or taking time for fasting and reflection, shared spiritual goals unite hearts and align them with God’s will.

Guard your time and your hearts. Cancel what doesn’t bring you closer to Christ or each other. Replace distractions with disciplines. Reclaim dinner tables for conversation, living rooms for devotionals, and moments of stress for supplication.

My wife and I have made it a daily practice to begin each morning with a devotion and end each evening in prayer. These are not simply habits—they are lifelines. In those quiet moments, we invite the Lord to dwell among us, to shape our hearts, to guide our thoughts, and to strengthen our union. This commitment has not only deepened our relationship with God but also enriched our love and respect for one another.

When couples anchor their lives to God, their marriage becomes more than a relationship—it becomes a ministry. It reflects Christ’s love to the world and brings glory to the One who joined them together. It becomes a beacon of hope in a culture that has forgotten the sacredness of marriage.

The First Pillar reminds us that God must not merely be included in our marriages—He must be enthroned. He must be the center, the source, and the sustainer. When we keep our focus fixed on Him, our marriages are strengthened against the winds of adversity and the erosion of time.

May your marriage be a living testimony to God’s faithfulness—a place where love is sacrificial, forgiveness is swift, and joy is abundant because Christ reigns supreme in every word, every decision, and every moment.

So, I say to you, “May the Lord strengthen your faith and use it for His glory, as you walk humbly in His presence.”